Helping Kids Who Get Bullied at School

[bawang]

yes and no, KF. Normal kids also get bullied by bullies with no social skills.

My daughter was being harrassed by kids because she was half Asian. When push came to shove, she handled it. Three boys ganged up on her, hit her in the face with a basketball, and she trashed all three. We were brought in and I basically told the principal the same thing moying said. My kid was sent home, so we took her out to lunch and a movie.
Another time a girl threw a football into her chest-she was sitting down talking to her friends at gym. The gym teacher did nothing, so she took care of it. Same scenerio-I came in, yelled at the gym teacher, the principal and then took my kid out to I-HOP and a movie.
(what is it with my kid and getting hit with balls, anyway..?)
No, we don't encourage violence in my family, but when they need to defend themselves, we will always back them.
Besides, I really like I-HOP.

nice. you have honor
your kids learn important life lson: MERCY IS FOR THE WEAK ONLY THE STRONG SURVIVE

[monkeyfoot]

Interesting topic

My mother pushed the idea of non-violence (super Christian) and as a young boy (7-11) I paid the price for this. I was picked on all the time by my best mate, and my kind hearted nature always always stopped me from fighting. I barely defended myself, and people always took advantage of this. I wasn't weak or anything like that (i'd always fight with my older brothers) but I just never fought back or defended myself. I loose count how many times my nose has been broken...

Anyway, when I have a child I will teach him/her to hit hard, fast, and defeat the bully as quickly as possible, using whatever the situation requires. I could have benefited so much from someone who instilled this approach in me, and it would have saved me years of people taking advantage of my good nature.

But then I always think the bullies end up the losers. All the bullies I knew came from bad/angry/divorced/abusive families, and they generally grew up to be useless failures with little going for them. On the other hand, myself and others I know who got bullied at one point or another in their childhood have grown up to be stronger better people. I have a great girlfriend, I've travelled the world, I love my job....now I think, "yea sure you bullied me, but I'm not the one collecting trollies for 4 pounds and hour from the local store".

HAR HARRRRRR

[David Jamieson]

If you "train" your child to fight, and they fail because life isn't a movie about righteousness then I wonder what you guys would think the result would be?

Think about it. Just because you train someone, doesn't mean anything. That's just training.

If your mini black belt gets his ass handed to him after you encourage them to fight, then what?

Is it not wiser to teach your child to escape or to trust the authorities to help him/her?

A child is a weak little thing, approaching them as if they are cold, calculating problem solvers based on your emotional reaction to them getting bullied will not always lead to a good place.

just sayin...

[Syn7]

A child is a weak little thing, approaching them as if they are cold, calculating problem solvers based on your emotional reaction to them getting bullied will not always lead to a good place.

just sayin...

this...................................... yesssssss......



and like was mentioned above: what if they lose to an untrained goon??? what will that do to them psychologically after youve instilled all that confidence and tell them if they train and act right they wont get hurt???

[Sardinkahnikov]

Is it not wiser to teach your child to escape or to trust the authorities to help him/her?

lol god, no

[David Jamieson]

lol god, no

really?

did you know that some of the very best street proof your kids programs involve exacly those things?

do you not expect your child to trust you as an authority?

Would you not want to provide them with the best solution that they do not have to feel bad about being physically assaulted and nor do they have to endure the psychological responsibility of harming someone else.

Can you trust a child to measure their use of force at a young age?

If you teach your child to escape, to call out and to seek protection with people he can trust you are probably teaching them the most sane thing you can.

Bullies can be dealt with, they always are. It is up to those who put the children in the situation where they encounter bullies to deal with that problem.

So, the teachers, the institution that you send your child too and all that is your responsibility. Knowing who their friends are and where they hang out and being for them is even more important.

Give it some thought before you teach a kid to fold his hand to a fist.

[mooyingmantis]

really?

did you know that some of the very best street proof your kids programs involve exacly those things?

do you not expect your child to trust you as an authority?

Would you not want to provide them with the best solution that they do not have to feel bad about being physically assaulted and nor do they have to endure the psychological responsibility of harming someone else.

Can you trust a child to measure their use of force at a young age?

If you teach your child to escape, to call out and to seek protection with people he can trust you are probably teaching them the most sane thing you can.

Bullies can be dealt with, they always are. It is up to those who put the children in the situation where they encounter bullies to deal with that problem.

So, the teachers, the institution that you send your child too and all that is your responsibility. Knowing who their friends are and where they hang out and being for them is even more important.

Give it some thought before you teach a kid to fold his hand to a fist.

Though that sounds so nice, that approach is failing miserably in the US. My wife is a public school teacher whose school has adopted the above approach. Unfortunately, there is no less bullying or violence.
Kids who run to others for protection become even larger targets.

Knowing who their friends are and where they hang out and being for them is even more important.

That statement is right on target!

[TenTigers]

really?
Give it some thought before you teach a kid to fold his hand to a fist.

quite true. Most kids don't have the wrist developed enough to throw a decent punch. Palm strikes are far better suited.
You also have the added benefit of teaching them those "Bully Buster" techniques, where they put up both their palms and say,
"Stop! I don't want any trouble!"
then they can slam their palms into the kids nose, and follow up with an eye gouge, rip down the face, catch their lower lip and rip down as hard as they can, grab their head with both hands and slam it into his knee, snap the head back and power drive it into the cement for the win.
-unless they're under six. Then they should run away and tell.

[Iron_Eagle_76]

This entire thread stinks of politically correct brain washed ideologies of walk away, no tolerance, BS the school system as well as our left wing sh**it infested government is trying to sell. When I was young, if you got in a fight at school, you got detention, got suspended, or if you were smart, you went somewhere you would not get caught.

Teach your children to walk tall, proud, and take no sh**it from anyone, albeit what some liberal ******wad like Jameison will tell you.

We need more John Wayne and John Kreese bad a**ss role models in this world. The irony is people can't seem to figure out why their children are such limp noodle candy a**sses. Strike first, strike hard, no mercy Sir!!!

[mooyingmantis]

This entire thread stinks of politically correct brain washed ideologies of walk away, no tolerance, BS the school system as well as our left wing sh**it infested government is trying to sell. When I was young, if you got in a fight at school, you got detention, got suspended, or if you were smart, you went somewhere you would not get caught.

Teach your children to walk tall, proud, and take no sh**it from anyone, albeit what some liberal ******wad like Jameison will tell you.

We need more John Wayne and John Kreese bad a**ss role models in this world. The irony is people can't seem to figure out why their children are such limp noodle candy a**sses. Strike first, strike hard, no mercy Sir!!!

Geez, for once I actually agree with you!

Though I have no bad comments about Jamieson. Perhaps if more people truly felt like he does, this world would be a better place. Unfortunately, that is not reality.

[Lucas]

there are too many freaking people. i'm suprised i didnt get plucked off by natural selection. the main point though is that, as long as you kids are smart, know what up and down, left and right is. If they have all the info, and good support, and everything is in order, **** can still go down. back up plan, cant run no help, you want them to know what to do.

spider man told us all folks. great power. so if you can trust your kids, and i hope you can since YOU raise them, make sure they can defend themselves. thats just my opinion, and i know a lot of people do and dont agree, thus is life.

anyway, no matter what you do or dont do, if your kid isnt a wuss, they already think they can kick everyones ass. you are their dad after all.

[PalmStriker]

Number One Myth: The Bully grows up to spend his life bagging groceries and retrieving shopping carts. Truth: These individuals look for easy targets later in life and are often incarcerated for violent crimes involving robbery and drug use, murder and multiple criminal crimes. These birds of a feather have much in common and are not banking on social skills for success. Some of them become crooked cops in the company of other criminally inclined "enforcers". And then there's the sociopath.....

[David Jamieson]

Violence begets violence and rarely does any good come from it.
Don't expect a child to be of the mind that you are of.

The less violence in a child's life, the better.

I don't know how that makes me a liberal ******wad. lol

[David Jamieson]

This entire thread stinks of politically correct brain washed ideologies of walk away, no tolerance, BS the school system as well as our left wing sh**it infested government is trying to sell. When I was young, if you got in a fight at school, you got detention, got suspended, or if you were smart, you went somewhere you would not get caught.

Teach your children to walk tall, proud, and take no sh**it from anyone, albeit what some liberal ******wad like Jameison will tell you.

We need more John Wayne and John Kreese bad a**ss role models in this world. The irony is people can't seem to figure out why their children are such limp noodle candy a**sses. Strike first, strike hard, no mercy Sir!!!

you've been listening to far too much sarah palin. lol

speaking of brainwashed! lol

such vitriol!

[TenTigers]

Number One Myth: The Bully grows up to spend his life bagging groceries and retrieving shopping carts. Truth: These individuals look for easy targets later in life and are often incarcerated for violent crimes involving robbery and drug use, murder and multiple criminal crimes. These birds of a feather have much in common and are not banking on social skills for success. Some of them become crooked cops in the company of other criminally inclined "enforcers". And then there's the sociopath.....

or worse, teachers, politicians, ceo's, stockbrokers...