I think I lost something along the way

People have read my less than flattering accounts of studying Kung Fu at the Shaolin Temple, as well as my humorus stories about studying and fighting in Taiwan.

It is clear that I have dedicated myself to fighting, rather than to art. I trained and fought in thailand, which is just a huge gladiator academy.

now i am making kung fu movies in cambodia. in addition to my training for the movies, i just signed to fight (boxing) profesionally here in cambodia. there is a new foreign trainer here who is arranging title fights with WBC or one of the big leagues in USA. and i will probaly have a big televised fight in september (78 kg).

now that i am boxing again, the first good (fighting) training i have had since coming to asia, i think my opinion on fighting and kung fu is changing.

i love the boxing and fighting.

but maybe there is a place for the art as well.

when i was elevn or twelve years old, i believed in the magic of kung fu. i believed in the art. i thought it was something sacred and holy, and every night i said a prayer of thanks that i was being blessed with an opportuinity to learn these secrets, which had been passed down through teh ages, by generations of masters.

today, when i was supposed to be writing an article, I stumbled on to a website devoted to the TV show, KUNG FU.

Cain to his master: Old man, how is it that you can hear so much?
Master: Young student, how is it that you cannot?

re-reading all of those great philosophical quotes, i remembered why i began studying kung fu in the first place.

for the hour or so that it took me to read everything on the site, it was as if i had become a small kid again, and my belief in the mystery of kung fu was there. It reminded me why i began studying kung fu, and why I continued even when I showed no real aptitude for sports in general. It reminded me why I used to believe that every day of training brought me closer to enlightenment, and why I couldn't sleep at night, dreaming of my next training session, and of some day going to the shaolin temple, for real.

But why have I never found that in asia, not even for a second? was it because I was too proud? was I punching when I should have been listening?

But if it is me, why do I not know a single foreigner who ever found that wonder and magic in China and Taiwan?

I found the Thais and Cambodians refreshing, because at least they didn't pretend to have magic.

i'm not sure what that is worth. but i wanted to share. and if anyone has a constructive comment or even an insult, I'd be glad to listen.

did anyone else watch that show religiously as a kid? and, if so, did you experience disalusionment when you found that real Kung fu did not match Quai Chang Cains experience?